Monday, February 14, 2011

agent cupid: the arrow who loved me

History doesn't give much credit to Cupid's archery skills. They focus on the fact that he shot the "love arrow" at people, but forget that he can shoot that arrow, from, like, a million miles away!

I once heard that he shot a hole through a coin at twenty paces. Blindfolded. And shirtless! Because that's how Cupid rolls.

And shirts hold back the wings. Cuz when you got wings, you want to fly!

There was this one time that Cupid had to infiltrate a secret government facility operated by evil karate ducks and had to cover his wings so he could wear all black to sneak in.

He couldn't fly, but still got in all ninja-style and arrowed everything. Like, EVERYTHING. Every arrow hit every mark perfectly! He had to get a flash drive arrow into a usb port on a computer. He did it from a ventilation shaft. He downloaded the info needed and then destroyed the computer.

WHAT?! That's right, he did that! THAT is how good he is.

He's a mad-crazy toxophilite.

So if you got hit by Cupid's arrow, you were SUPPOSED to get hit with it. He doesn't miss. Ever.

Okay, so once he scratched himself with an arrow and fell in love with Psyche, but she was kinda hot, so he was distracted. Honest mistake.

I'm off to check my fletchings.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ

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