Friday, May 22, 2009

hot sauce unicorn

Have you ever heard of sriracha? It's a type of hot sauce. It's pretty good with pho. Pho is a beef broth and noodle soup popular in Vietnam. Apparently, it's also good with just about everything else.

There's a guy who makes a sriracha called "Rooster Sauce" because there is a rooster on the bottle. This guy has become pretty darn popular. Due to his popularity, other folks have tried to market their sriracha in a similar fashion. Including "Unicorn Sauce." Not made from real unicorns.

Since unicorns are magical (and real), that must mean Unicorn Sauce will make all your food TASTE magical! AND different things will happen if you put it on different foods.

If you put some Unicorn Sauce into your tuna fish sandwich, then you will turn into a fish-person. It will only last for a little while, but it's cool if you ever wanted to swim in the olympics and win a bunch of medals. (I'm looking at you Phelps!)

Also, if you like your sriracha on pizza, then you will become a large turtle that is trained in the art of ninjitsu. That's probably my favorite one.

Or, if you would like shoot fire out of your eyes, you have to drink a whole bottle of Unicorn Sauce. This is only suggested for people in a battle with a giant frost monster. Otherwise, you will probably burn your furniture and your couch won't be very soft.

Another cool one happens if you eat it on leaves. You turn green and don't need to eat because you can now photosynthesize. Which is cool. Unless you do it at night.

There are others, but they aren't very fun, like if you put some in milk, you will turn into a cow. Not very exciting.

So go get some Unicorn Sauce and try it with different foods. I can't actually prove that any of these things will happen, but I believe they do, and in my imagination, everything is real.

I'm off to get a pizza and become a ninja turtle.

Enjoy!

-DJ

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