Thursday, April 2, 2009

don't eat with scissors

A man in China got a pair of scissors stuck in his throat after laughing. He started laughing because his friend told him a joke. The scissors were near his mouth because he was cleaning his teeth with them.

Take a moment to just think about that.

WHAT IN THE BLUE BLAZES WAS THIS MAN THINKING?! WHO CLEANS THEIR TEETH WITH SCISSORS?!

Really?! This guy thought the scissors were the best choice for oral hygiene? I can't imagine how he was cleaning his teeth with scissors, but let's just say that this method works. If you are with somebody who is, in fact, cleaning their teeth with scissors, DO NOT MAKE THEM LAUGH! Save the joke. Because jokes stop being funny REAL FAST when scissors get swallowed.

Somebody should ask for a toothbrush for Arbor Day. That's like using an axe to cut your hair.

"Hmmmm...My hair is getting a little shaggy. I should get the axe out. I'm sure that is the perfect hair cutting device. And maybe my nails need trimming. I hope the chainsaw is gassed up. Oh, I forgot to put my shoes on...now where did I put those steak knives and mercury?"

Ouch...I don't know how to put my shoes on with steak knives and mercury, but I bet the scissor-man can.

I'm off to brush my teeth WITH A TOOTHBRUSH!

Enjoy!

-DJ

1 comment:

coffee maker said...

this reminds of Sherwood Anderson, an American writer who died from accidentally swallowing a toothpick