the minotaur

It's time for part two of my vacation series when I've titled "Vacation Episode II: Attack of the Golf."

Did you know that Myrtle Beach is the miniature golf capital of the world? It's something like that because there are more mini golf courses than actual residents in Myrtle Beach. It's true. Drive down the street and you will see. It's crazy.

I was able to play at two, count'em TWO, courses. Yep. How's that for excitement. Let me tell you all about them.

The first place was called "Hawaiian Rumble" and it is where the professionals play. It is officially sanctioned by the USPMGA. You know it, the U.S. Pro Mini-Golf Association. They love this place. Why? I think it has to do with the live volcano in the middle of the course. The course itself was not very creative or challenging, but about every 15 minutes the volcano in the middle of the coarse rumbles and shoots out a ball of fire.

USPMGA's love that stuff. Don't believe me? Go ask your local USPMGA member. They'll tell you.

You: Do you love fake volcanoes shooting off fire when you're practicing?

USPMGA member: You bet your sweet putter I do!

Told you so. They love to put the word "putter" in the place of other words all the time. It's crazy having a conversation with a USPMGA member.

You: Hey Barry! How are you?

USPMGA member Barry: I'm putter-riffic!

You: That's cool. Did you hear about those stupid new parking rules?

Barry: They are un-putter-believable! Those putt-offs in corporate don't know a putter thang.

You: You're tellin' me. I'll see you at lunch.

Barry: I'll be there with putters on!

Wow...if you can understand that, maybe you should join the USPMGA.

The other course I got to check out was "Mount Atlanticus' Minotaur Goff." I think they spelled it like that on purpose. It was actually a huge place with two WAY cool courses. I think it actually scares USPMGA-ers because of the minotaurness. They had a minotaur course and a conch course. You slowly go up four flights of stairs playing the game and then you have to climb all the way down to finish your game. It's crazy. You're in this hut four stories up in the air playing miniature golf. It's actually pretty cool.

I hope I didn't offend any USPMGA members. I'm just funnin' ya. I make fun because I'm jealous of your coolness...no seriously...I totally am...ahem...please don't come after me with your putters.

I'm off to do some putter fencing.

Enjoy!

-DJ