year end

A lot of people make lists for the end of the year. I have decided to make some lists as well.

Okay, so I can’t really think of anything worth listing, but I thought it would be fun to do what everybody else was doing. I guess it’s not going to happen.

Sorry to disappoint you. Will stickers make you feel better? Remember scratch and sniff stickers? Those were cool. I wonder if you can still get them.

How did they do that? Did they ever do any studies to find out if they were toxic? They probably were. Back then it didn’t matter if we were inhaling toxic chemicals. As long as we scratched a banana and then smelled a banana!

Best Smells of 2009!

Cherry!

And that’s it. It’s a short list, but a good one!

I’m off to scratch and sniff!

Enjoy!

-DJ

full circle

I saw the coolest thing! On Christmas day, some kids were out testing their new toys and one of the kids had a tricycle. Now, this wasn’t just any trike. This bad boy had wheels in the back that rotated a full THREE HUNDRED AND SIXTY DEGREES!

He could do spin-outs and swirls and kickers and any other word you want to make up that sounds cool!

When I was a kid, I had a yellow plastic car. With a smiley face on the front. It did not rotate. Granted, I thought it was cool, but where were these Three-Sixty trikes when I was a kid?!

Kids have the coolest stuff now. I want one of those tricycles. Maybe next year.

Oh yeah, and in case you’re wondering, do NOT go for a run when it is 15 degrees Fahrenheit and the wind chill makes it feel like -9. You will get very cold.

I’m off to do some swirls and kickers.

Enjoy!

-DJ

that’s not me.

I was at the store this weekend and something odd happened. I wasn’t me. I know! So strange!

I gave my little discount card to the cashier and he broke it. He has Hulk-like strength. Which makes him good for cashiering.

So I gave him my phone number so I could get all my groceries for a few pennies off. He typed in my number and wanted to confirm who I was. My name, according to their files, is Ramon. I won’t give my last name, but it certainly wasn’t my actual last name. Nor is Ramon my first name.

So is Ramon using my phone number to get fantastic deals at the store? Why would Ramon do that?

I went to get my new card and it turns out they had a very strange phone number in there that certainly was NOT mine.

Perhaps it was Ramon’s. I don’t know. I’ve never gotten a phone call asking for Ramon.

Maybe I should call my number to see who answers. If it’s Ramon, we’re gonna have a little talk about savings cards. I hope I don’t make him cry. I can use strong words at times.

I’m off to save money at the store.

Enjoy!

-DJ

scattered

I have felt a little scattered this week. I'm officially on vacation after today, so maybe I'm in vacation mode already. But, I've had a lot of work to do, so my thoughts have been a little crazy.

Yesterday my underwear was on inside-out. Not backwards, thank goodness, just inside-out.

And you know what else? I didn't mind. Heck, I didn't even notice until I put my pajamas on! So I guess it's not that bad!

What will I do on vacation, you ask? I haven't decided yet. Time travel might be involved, so you may find me in your history books.

I'm thinking of sneaking into a picture with Teddy Roosevelt. That would be fun. He reminds me of Santa.

Maybe I'll pick blueberries. Those are yummy.

Ostriches are cute, too. I won't pick them. I'll just say hello to some.

I'm off to check my underwear.

Enjoy!

-DJ

nutella

I have recently tried Nutella. I don't remember ever having it before. I don't know why. I just never bought it and I never had it when I was a kid.

It's pretty good. I think most people have a fond childhood memory of having chocolate sandwiches, so they are more likely to have a good feeling about Nutella. I just tried it. My fond memories are of having it yesterday.

That's all I got. I just thought I should try it. At least once. You should try it too.

Does anybody whistle? It's such a "Snow White" thing to do. Are there any young whistlers out there? I feel like whistling isn't as cool as it used to be.

Are there any cool songs with somebody whistling? Maybe some hardcore rap music? I think that would be fun.

I also think riding in the shopping cart is fun. But I don't do it. Because nobody will push me. Usually I'm sitting in a cart in the middle of the candy aisle waiting for somebody to come along and push me around.

They never do.

I'm off to get in a cart and shop for some Nutella.

Enjoy!

-DJ

width and heighth

I've been hearing this word a lot lately. I have no idea how it happened, but height has become heighth.

I'm pretty sure it is not a word. It is considered "non-standard" english. Which means it is not a word.

Now, I'm all about making up words, but for some reason heighth just sounds wrong and I don't like it.

So don't use it.

What I would like you to use is rooves. As in, "There is more than one roof." I know it's roofs, but rooves is just so much more fun to say! Heighth is not more fun to say.

Finally, don't forget to turn your lights off after you park your car. The parking lots are very busy, so when you leave your lights on, I think you are about to pull out of a spot. When, in fact, you are not even there and left your lights on to trick me into waiting for your parking spot.

That is not funny.

Okay, it would be kinda funny if I did it to you, but not when you do it to me.

I'm off to find a REAL parking spot.

Enjoy!

-DJ

watch me now

I just bought a new watch. I don't wear a watch, but I always have one. I stopped wearing a watch before it was cool to stop wearing a watch.

In the late 90s, before kids had cell phones, people wore watches. I HATED it. So, I started keeping a watch in my pocket. Then, I found a way to attach my keys to the watch. I just had to remove the wrist strap. After that, I've never gone back.

I've always gotten a Timex Expedition. Because it's water-proof up to 100 meters. Or down to, I guess. You never know when you're going to fall into a 99-meter deep puddle where somebody asks you the time. Happens to me every Thursday for some reason.

Guess what my new watch has on it. A COMPASS! How cool is that! I can tell you what direction I'm moving in! AND THE TIME!

I know what you're thinking. "I can buy a compass anywhere. That's nothing special."

Well, is the compass ATTACHED TO YOUR WATCH!? I didn't think so!

It's also good because I got lost in my puddle last Thursday. This compass will help me out a lot.

Now I'll always know where I am in space and time. Though I guess that's relative. (HA! That's right! It's a physics joke! I'm not ashamed!)

I'm off to go north.

Enjoy!

-DJ