I've RAVED about Ketchup Potato Chips in the past. And for good reason. They taste like awesome.
Unfortunately, they're hard to find in the U.S. In Canada, you can't toss a hockey stick without hitting a few bags of Ketchup-Flavored potato chips.
But China has the REAL treasure! They have flavors like Blueberry, Lemon Tea, and Cucumber!
They even have flavors unknown to me! French Chicken, Hot and Sour Fish Soup, and Numb and Spicy Hot Pot!
What are those?! What's the difference between chicken and French chicken? What does "Numb and Spicy Hot Pot" even mean?!
It sounds fantastic! Why do we, in the U.S., get so little variety in our chips? I don't get it. We need some new flavors! Food is so boring here. Let's spice it up a bit!
OR! Let's numb and spice it up a bit!
Do you go numb? Would you just collapse after eating a bag? It sounds so fun! I need to try some!
I'm off to get numb and spicy.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
Showing posts with label china. Show all posts
Showing posts with label china. Show all posts
Friday, September 10, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
bed box
A guy in China has created a quake-proof bed. It's a bed that has a cover that slides over you if it feels an earthquake happening. So, if stuff starts falling from above, you will be protected in this box!
This is cool! It's also great for volcanoes. And maybe rain. If it is raining in your bedroom. That happens sometimes when you have a lot of moisture.
It's a pretty cool idea. It might be fun to put a light in there and just close it up when you want some alone time. Maybe put a TV in there and watch a movie.
Then if there IS an earthquake, you can finish watching the bonus features on your Transformers DVD without being interrupted by falling rocks!
OH! Meteors! I bet it's good for meteors too. I hate getting hit with meteors when I'm reading comic books.
I think I will get one of these. Maybe I'll water-proof it so I can bring it under water for my trips to Atlantis.
I'm off to call Aquaman.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
This is cool! It's also great for volcanoes. And maybe rain. If it is raining in your bedroom. That happens sometimes when you have a lot of moisture.
It's a pretty cool idea. It might be fun to put a light in there and just close it up when you want some alone time. Maybe put a TV in there and watch a movie.
Then if there IS an earthquake, you can finish watching the bonus features on your Transformers DVD without being interrupted by falling rocks!
OH! Meteors! I bet it's good for meteors too. I hate getting hit with meteors when I'm reading comic books.
I think I will get one of these. Maybe I'll water-proof it so I can bring it under water for my trips to Atlantis.
I'm off to call Aquaman.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
Friday, July 16, 2010
the china ufo
Wow! Did you see that? It was a UFO in China! I watched the video. It's totally cool.
I guess it happened last week, but the videos and pictures are just coming out now. And nobody seems to know what it is.
If they do know, they aren't talkin'!
They had to shut down the Xiaoshan Airport for an hour to let this thing pass! It was like when you have to wait for some stray ducklings to cross the road.
Maybe it was a little lost ship crossing the space. It just needed to get across the sky to get to its mommy. And that stopped air traffic.
So don't be mad! It's just a baby! It doesn't know any better! Give it a break!
Sometimes you can lure baby spaceships across the sky faster with bread crumbs and plutonium. I don't know why they didn't try that.
Baby spaceships are cute. And it's funny when their feathers get all ruffled up.
I'm off to find some bread crumbs.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
I guess it happened last week, but the videos and pictures are just coming out now. And nobody seems to know what it is.
If they do know, they aren't talkin'!
They had to shut down the Xiaoshan Airport for an hour to let this thing pass! It was like when you have to wait for some stray ducklings to cross the road.
Maybe it was a little lost ship crossing the space. It just needed to get across the sky to get to its mommy. And that stopped air traffic.
So don't be mad! It's just a baby! It doesn't know any better! Give it a break!
Sometimes you can lure baby spaceships across the sky faster with bread crumbs and plutonium. I don't know why they didn't try that.
Baby spaceships are cute. And it's funny when their feathers get all ruffled up.
I'm off to find some bread crumbs.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
space program
In space, everybody can smell your breath. Or so I'm told. By China.
China has some strict rules for their astronauts. If you want to get up to that space station in the sky, you must NOT have bad breath. And that is only one of their requirements.
Some of the other rules are that you cannot have a runny nose, no scars, and no cavities. They also said that your wife has to allow you to go. Implying that women aren't allowed in space.
Why? Well, we all know how it is in space. If you were a woman with a runny nose, scars and cavities, you might...um...scare...uh...I don't know. There's nothing up there! Do they think some alien life form (or ALF, as the government calls them) won't talk to you if you have scars? Aliens might love a good scar story!
Female Astronaut: Hello ALF!
ALF: I'm not talking to you.
Female Astronaut: Why not?
ALF: You have a scar. And a cavity. And you are a woman.
Female Astronaut: Yeah, but you should hear the story about how I got the scar! It involves a samurai and a pile of waffles!
ALF: (holding his hand in front of her face) See this? This is me not talking to you.
Female Astronaut: Jerk.
And that is why China is leading the way in space travel! They know how it is up there! You have a degree in space travel? WHO CARES! You didn't brush your teeth enough! OUT!
I like brushing my teeth.
I'm off to apply for a job in the Australian space program. They'll take just about anybody.
Enjoy!
-DJ
China has some strict rules for their astronauts. If you want to get up to that space station in the sky, you must NOT have bad breath. And that is only one of their requirements.
Some of the other rules are that you cannot have a runny nose, no scars, and no cavities. They also said that your wife has to allow you to go. Implying that women aren't allowed in space.
Why? Well, we all know how it is in space. If you were a woman with a runny nose, scars and cavities, you might...um...scare...uh...I don't know. There's nothing up there! Do they think some alien life form (or ALF, as the government calls them) won't talk to you if you have scars? Aliens might love a good scar story!
Female Astronaut: Hello ALF!
ALF: I'm not talking to you.
Female Astronaut: Why not?
ALF: You have a scar. And a cavity. And you are a woman.
Female Astronaut: Yeah, but you should hear the story about how I got the scar! It involves a samurai and a pile of waffles!
ALF: (holding his hand in front of her face) See this? This is me not talking to you.
Female Astronaut: Jerk.
And that is why China is leading the way in space travel! They know how it is up there! You have a degree in space travel? WHO CARES! You didn't brush your teeth enough! OUT!
I like brushing my teeth.
I'm off to apply for a job in the Australian space program. They'll take just about anybody.
Enjoy!
-DJ
Monday, July 13, 2009
um...this thing...I...hmmmm...
I have no idea how to describe this, so I'm just going to blurt it out. In China, there is a mountain that lays eggs. It's true! The board of tourism says so!
They say that Gandeng Mountain has laid more than 100 eggs. And another one is expected soon. So you might want to book your next vacation to Gulu, China. To see a mountain. Lay an egg.
The article didn't specify what comes out of the egg. I think it's a baby mountain.
They're very cute. And playful. But you have to watch out for their peaks. They can be sharp. They're like baby porcupines or baby jellyfish. Fun to play with, but you could go home with an injury.
I guess the same could be said for human babies, too. Especially babies on roller skates. Scary AND dangerous.
I'm off to see a mountain baby.
Enjoy!
-DJ
They say that Gandeng Mountain has laid more than 100 eggs. And another one is expected soon. So you might want to book your next vacation to Gulu, China. To see a mountain. Lay an egg.
The article didn't specify what comes out of the egg. I think it's a baby mountain.
They're very cute. And playful. But you have to watch out for their peaks. They can be sharp. They're like baby porcupines or baby jellyfish. Fun to play with, but you could go home with an injury.
I guess the same could be said for human babies, too. Especially babies on roller skates. Scary AND dangerous.
I'm off to see a mountain baby.
Enjoy!
-DJ
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
eyelids, not just for blinking anymore
China has gotten a lot of bad press over the past year with reports of tainted milk and deadly toys, but their PR people have to step it up a little bit. The Olympics showed their good side, but it seems like they stopped caring after that.
A Chinese martial artist has put China in the public eye again for pulling a car. You may have seen that sort of thing when a really strong guy pulls a truck or something. Well those guys ain't got nuthin' on Luo. Luo attached a rope to a car, and then attached the other end of the rope to his eyelids. Actually, he hooked it into his eyelids. Then, if that wasn't cool enough for the ladies, he pulled the car.
Here's what he had to say about doing this amazing feat, "I really wanted to do something special."
Really? Did you? That's what you came up with? Not saving a baby from a burning building or something? You felt that pulling a car with your eyelids was "something special?"
Luo isn't a one-trick pony, either. He says he can also (kids, don't try this at home) stop an electric fan with his tongue. I don't know how fast this fan is going, but I'm pretty sure if it's going faster than "stopped", then I don't want to stick my tongue in it.
I probably shouldn't make fun of him because it's not like I have any talents, but if I ever decided that I wanted to be good at something, I probably wouldn't risk injury to my body. I'm pretty happy with my eyelids just blinking and my tongue moving around so I can talk.
If you can do something like this guy, I'd LOVE to hear about it. You don't have to send a picture or anything because looking at this guy with hooks in his eyelids has pretty much scarred me for life. I am somewhat afraid to go to sleep.
I'm off to move my car using the gas pedal. Check it out ladies. vroooooom.
Enjoy!
-DJ
A Chinese martial artist has put China in the public eye again for pulling a car. You may have seen that sort of thing when a really strong guy pulls a truck or something. Well those guys ain't got nuthin' on Luo. Luo attached a rope to a car, and then attached the other end of the rope to his eyelids. Actually, he hooked it into his eyelids. Then, if that wasn't cool enough for the ladies, he pulled the car.
Here's what he had to say about doing this amazing feat, "I really wanted to do something special."
Really? Did you? That's what you came up with? Not saving a baby from a burning building or something? You felt that pulling a car with your eyelids was "something special?"
Luo isn't a one-trick pony, either. He says he can also (kids, don't try this at home) stop an electric fan with his tongue. I don't know how fast this fan is going, but I'm pretty sure if it's going faster than "stopped", then I don't want to stick my tongue in it.
I probably shouldn't make fun of him because it's not like I have any talents, but if I ever decided that I wanted to be good at something, I probably wouldn't risk injury to my body. I'm pretty happy with my eyelids just blinking and my tongue moving around so I can talk.
If you can do something like this guy, I'd LOVE to hear about it. You don't have to send a picture or anything because looking at this guy with hooks in his eyelids has pretty much scarred me for life. I am somewhat afraid to go to sleep.
I'm off to move my car using the gas pedal. Check it out ladies. vroooooom.
Enjoy!
-DJ
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