At a wedding in England, the new couple decided that, instead of cake, they would have a 22-pound, four-tier cake/pie made out of pork.
I don't know what else to say. I now know that pork cake is cheaper than a traditional wedding cake. I also know that pork cake sounds disgusting.
Do you think they smooshed it into each other's faces? That's gross. Not just regular gross, but the kid of gross that only comes from people smearing pork products on their face.
In order to get that image out of our heads, I'm going to tell you a story.
On a sunshiny day, all the rainbows decided to come out and play. All the people in the land came out and danced on giant cakes made of sugar and frosting. Then, when everybody was done dancing on cake, we all jumped in the pools of pie! Pie-pools filled with sugary, fruit sweetness. Finally, the day was completed with movies about stuffed animals eating cupcakes and gummy bears.
The end.
Don't you feel better?
I'm off to buy normal, sugar-cake.
Enjoy!
-DJ
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