At a wedding in England, the new couple decided that, instead of cake, they would have a 22-pound, four-tier cake/pie made out of pork.
I don't know what else to say. I now know that pork cake is cheaper than a traditional wedding cake. I also know that pork cake sounds disgusting.
Do you think they smooshed it into each other's faces? That's gross. Not just regular gross, but the kid of gross that only comes from people smearing pork products on their face.
In order to get that image out of our heads, I'm going to tell you a story.
On a sunshiny day, all the rainbows decided to come out and play. All the people in the land came out and danced on giant cakes made of sugar and frosting. Then, when everybody was done dancing on cake, we all jumped in the pools of pie! Pie-pools filled with sugary, fruit sweetness. Finally, the day was completed with movies about stuffed animals eating cupcakes and gummy bears.
The end.
Don't you feel better?
I'm off to buy normal, sugar-cake.
Enjoy!
-DJ
Showing posts with label frosting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label frosting. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
holy sweet, batman!
I just found out that there are "cupcake shops." How did I not know about these already? Seriously? A store dedicated to cupcakes? HOW AWESOME IS THAT!
Wanna know how to make that deal even sweeter? (pun totally intended) There's a cupcake shop in Arizona that offers "frosting shots." Yep. Just like it sounds. A shot glass filled with frosting. That is, like, my idea of a bar in heaven.
St. Peter: What can I get for you?
Me: I'll take a shot of frosting, my good man!
St. Peter: Comin right up, captain! (in heaven, I will own boat, therefore I will be a captain)
...20 minutes later...
Me: Give me another!
St. Peter: Don't you think you've had enough?
Me: Lissen, Petey, I'll till yous whin hive hed enoof. I KNOW SOW MICH SHURGUR I CN HANDLES!
Then security will come and drag me away as I shake from my sugar high.
It will be the greatest experience of my life.
Oh, and if you're curious, my boat will be called the "Orinoco Flow". Get it? Sail Away? Enya? I think it's clever. I think my dad used to like that song. If not, I'm sorry dad. I like that song. It's strangely soothing. Whatever happened to Enya? I think I would play it every time I went sailing. That or something by Menudo. Either way works for me.
I'm off to the batten down the hatches.
Enjoy!
-DJ
Wanna know how to make that deal even sweeter? (pun totally intended) There's a cupcake shop in Arizona that offers "frosting shots." Yep. Just like it sounds. A shot glass filled with frosting. That is, like, my idea of a bar in heaven.
St. Peter: What can I get for you?
Me: I'll take a shot of frosting, my good man!
St. Peter: Comin right up, captain! (in heaven, I will own boat, therefore I will be a captain)
...20 minutes later...
Me: Give me another!
St. Peter: Don't you think you've had enough?
Me: Lissen, Petey, I'll till yous whin hive hed enoof. I KNOW SOW MICH SHURGUR I CN HANDLES!
Then security will come and drag me away as I shake from my sugar high.
It will be the greatest experience of my life.
Oh, and if you're curious, my boat will be called the "Orinoco Flow". Get it? Sail Away? Enya? I think it's clever. I think my dad used to like that song. If not, I'm sorry dad. I like that song. It's strangely soothing. Whatever happened to Enya? I think I would play it every time I went sailing. That or something by Menudo. Either way works for me.
I'm off to the batten down the hatches.
Enjoy!
-DJ
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