Ocean City, NJ is holding their 37th Annual Miss Crustacean Beauty Pageant for hermit crabs.
This implies that they have done it 36 times already.
1. After 36 years, how have I not heard about this yet?
B. What is going on in Ocean City that they decided to have a beauty pageant for crabs!?
It's based purely on good looks. No questions or bathing suits or anything. The prettiest crab wins. They win a crown and a cucumber trophy.
Hermit crabs look like they'd be good knights. They already have a suit of armor on. They have pointy legs. It would be pretty cool to have them fight stuff like evil demons or jellyfish. The crabs of the round table with King Crab Arthur.
OOOOH! And one could have a wizard hat! Merlyn the Hermit Crab! Or maybe he would be Hermyn the Hermyt Crab.
I'm not very good with English to Old English to Hermit Crab translation. I didn't even know there was an English to Old English to Hermit Crab conversion until I made it up just now.
Do you have a pretty hermit crab? Well you better get to Ocean City! The contest starts soon! But if you miss it this year, it seems pretty likely that they'll do it again next year. I mean, if nobody stopped it yet...after 36 years...it's prolly gonna happen again.
I'm off to decorate my crab.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
Showing posts with label jellyfish. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jellyfish. Show all posts
Monday, July 26, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
jelly vs. pitch
Or Fish Versus Fork! A jellyfish started attacking people at a beach in New Hampshire so a lifeguard grabbed a pitchfork and forked the jellyfish!
I want that lifeguard at my pool! A pitchfork?! It's like a trident! Maybe the lifeguard is actually Poseidon, God of the Sea! He used to carry a trident around.
How cool is that?! It's like Clash of the Titans around here! Giant mutant jellyfish are attacking the people and Poseidon, dressed as a lifeguard, is protecting humanity!
Can you imagine fighting off those tentacles with a pitchfork? Pretty awesome! I bet people tried shooting it with lasers first, but that didn't work.
OOOH! Maybe there was a damsel in distress, too! But Lifeguard-Poseidon (scuba gear sold separately) forked the giant, mutant jellyfish and it let her go. Then he caught her. And she looked into his eyes as his long hair was blowing in the breeze and said, "Help Poseidon. You're my only hope."
The battle went on for days, but everybody is now safe.
So, that was pretty epic. Oh, and if you actually read a news story about this, it might be different than what you just read, but mine is the truth. Newspaper people just didn't get all the facts. I did.
I'm off to find my trident.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
I want that lifeguard at my pool! A pitchfork?! It's like a trident! Maybe the lifeguard is actually Poseidon, God of the Sea! He used to carry a trident around.
How cool is that?! It's like Clash of the Titans around here! Giant mutant jellyfish are attacking the people and Poseidon, dressed as a lifeguard, is protecting humanity!
Can you imagine fighting off those tentacles with a pitchfork? Pretty awesome! I bet people tried shooting it with lasers first, but that didn't work.
OOOH! Maybe there was a damsel in distress, too! But Lifeguard-Poseidon (scuba gear sold separately) forked the giant, mutant jellyfish and it let her go. Then he caught her. And she looked into his eyes as his long hair was blowing in the breeze and said, "Help Poseidon. You're my only hope."
The battle went on for days, but everybody is now safe.
So, that was pretty epic. Oh, and if you actually read a news story about this, it might be different than what you just read, but mine is the truth. Newspaper people just didn't get all the facts. I did.
I'm off to find my trident.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)