Tuesday, September 16, 2008

souperman

I think flu season is coming. Why do I think that? I may have had a flu-like problem yesterday. Isn't there a 24-hour flu? I hope that makes me immune to the flu for the rest of my life. That would be swell.

Have you ever had those days where all the weird stuff happens at once? That was my yesterday. I might have had a better handle on it if I didn't have the thing that I'm calling the flu.

I came into work and felt ill. I wasn't sure, though, so I had Dina (the morning co-host/mother I work with) use her motherly powers to check. We both put aside our boundary issues for a few seconds and she checked my forehead. I wanted to find out if I was hot. It turns out I was only warm.

That's how I know if I'm sick. Usually, I'm totally hot (ha!). When my forehead said that I was warm, I knew something was amiss.

I decided to get soup before I went home. I was at the soup store when I remembered that I also needed peanut butter. That's important later on the story. I'm slightly delirious while I'm putting peanut butter in my carriage when a girl comes up to me and asks if I can help her. I'm pretty sure I told her that I wasn't actually employed by the soup store (with peanut butter), but she kept talking.

She actually gave me a card and wanted me to sell insurance or something. I think I agreed to sell insurance, but it's all pretty hazy. I know this really happened because I have a card with a girls name and number on it.

Then I went to the register. The lady there was very nice and very talkative. Not in a bad way, just very friendly.

Unfortunately, as you may recall, I wasn't quite all there.

There was a conversation about coupons that confused the heck out of me. Then she asked me why I was buying four jars of peanut butter. In my head, buying four jars makes complete sense because I don't want to have to buy it for a few weeks. Here's what I remember from yesterday's conversation:

Register lady: (a lot of words and something about coupons)

Me: yeah. (in confused agreement)

Register lady: Ok, so what's the deal with all the peanut butter?

Me: uh...I like peanut butter?

Register lady: (a lot of words and something about chex mix...the baked ones....I totally remember her making sure I knew they were baked)

So, yeah. Did that conversation make sense to you? It shouldn't have. That's pretty much all I can remember before going home and falling asleep while watching Skunk Fu. (you may recall that I was going to tape cartoons on saturday and watch them during the week...well...Skunk Fu had the honor of being one of those shows)

Have you ever had a day like that? I have no proof that ALL of those things happened, but I'm fairly confident that they did.

I had the soup and today I feel a little better. Just in case, though, I'm not going to go out anywhere. I'm afraid of the conversations that might happen. Who knows what I'll agree to!

I'm off to fall asleep to cartoons.

Enjoy!

-DJ

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