peanut plane

Airlines are thinking of getting rid of peanuts. Again. I'm pretty sure they have talked about this in the past. I don't know why people get so upset. They make it seem like a free tiny pouch of peanuts on a plane is a basic human right.

Oh wait...I just looked at the Constitution. It's on there. Article 3: Section 3. Huh...who knew?

Well, now we have to worry about allergies! So many people have peanut allergies and it's just plain dangerous to have them on a plane.

I don't have any food allergies. I don't know why. Everybody else has them. Food allergy is the new black.

Or so I hear from my fashion designer friends. And I have, like, millions of fashion designer friends. Half of them are named Hans. It's pretty sweet. That's why I look so fashiony.

I would like to be allergic to something. Just so I can feel like I'm part of the group. And so I can have an Epipen.

Maybe I'll be allergic to tannins. In wine. Or maybe lipolyzed cream. I don't really know what that is, but I know it's in food.

Sigh. I guess I won't be allergic to anything. I'll just eat whatever.

Sorry. I'm boring.

I'm off to eat some tannin peanuts in lipolyzed cream.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ