run faster

Scientists have recently found that humans could possibly run as fast as 40 mph. Much faster than we originally thought. Our muscles can handle the strain up to that point. I guess if we ran faster than that, things would start breaking.

It's a good thing we can reach that speed because, as the study shows, "it's enough to escape a grizzly bear and much quicker than a T. Rex, which may have reached 18 mph during a good jog."

Now you have nothing to worry about! Got a bear after you? RUN! T. Rex shows up on your way to the bus? RUN! You can make it! You are much faster than a T. Rex!

Unless you are in a school zone. Then you might get eaten by the T. Rex. Of course, you have a lot of kids there to distract the T. Rex, so you might get away if you blend in with the crowd.

Yeah, you'll have to learn about Lewis and Clark again, but if you're lucky, you could be there for craft day. Nothing's better than paste and crayons.

I'm off to outrun a T. Rex.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ

run like the wind

Can you run? I can't. It's hard. I've been going to the gym for a while and enjoy the elliptical. I have found out that running is WAY harder than that. I can elliptical for about 30 minutes and not have a problem. If I run for about 10 minutes I'll collapse.

I got up to 13 minutes the other day. I was pretty excited.

I decided to run because I figure running has more real world applications than ellipticalling.

For example: If an elephant starts chasing me and all I have are elliptical skills, it will probably catch me immediately and beat me with its tusk or a lead pipe or something.

If I can run, I may come across a cache of ancient samurai weapons within 7 minutes of my 13 minute limit (and 'minute limit' is also really fun to say!). Therefore, I could defend myself with a wakizashi or a naginata and possibly extend my life a little bit.

Even though elephants are trained in many forms of martial arts, I'm pretty skilled with a wakizashi.

I'm off to run.

Enjoy!

-DJ

zero calories

A Harvard professor has created a new inhaler to help with your chocolate cravings. He has put chocolate-flavored powder in a tube that you can spray into your mouth. Like an inhaler.

This will, supposedly, make you eat less chocolate. You can get raspberry, mint, mango and plain chocolate. Yum!

I guess it's handy in a medical emergency. If you have chocolate-asthma...chocasthma?

Runner 1: Huff...puff...huff...I need my inhaler. My asthma is acting up...huff...

Runner 2: Huff...puff...me too...huff...

Runner 1: Puff...I didn't know you had asthma...

Runner 2: I don't...huff...it's chocolate flavored...

Runner 1: Huff...then why do you need it?

Runner 2: Why do you need yours?

Runner 1: Um...so I don't die?

Runner 2: Same here, my friend, same here... *psshhhhh* (chocolate inhaler action) Yeah...that's the stuff...

Would inhaling chocolate make you feel better after a brisk run? Probably not. Will a king size Hershey bar make you feel better after a brisk run? HECK YEAH! Science has proven it! And by science, I mean that I would totally eat a giant Hershey bar after running and love it!

So, if inhaling chocolate is good enough for you, then the product is out there. I don't really see this as working. If I bought a bag of jelly beans and sniffed it all day long, I would have to eat them all by the end of the day. When I say "have" to eat them, I literally mean that I would HAVE to eat them. It would become a law of nature. Like gravity. Or jokes about Canada.

I'm off to inhale my candy.

Enjoy!

-DJ