that there's a space harpoon. arrrrrr

Hold onto your peglegs, space pirates! The space harpoon is coming soon!

Do you find yourself flying through space trying to catch a giant comet but failing constantly? The great minds at NASA are working to bring you the future...TODAY!

I always have a problem chasing comets. They go fast and they are hard to land on. And using a Rapala Jointed Shad 05 Lure just gets me striped bass. I don't want them, so I throw them back. Into space.

But now, with a harpoon? BOOOOOOOM! You got that comet!

I once used a harpoon to catch a rogue mountain. It was crushing ancient cities and stuff. But I caught it and it is now stuffed and mounted.

Yeah, it's a mounted mountain. (Taxidermists love that joke)

Now that NASA is looking for a few good harpoonists, I'm pretty sure they will call me up. Since I do hunt in space. And I also know how to harpoon things.

I'm also pretty good at bird calls. NASA is big on ornithology audio. (Try saying that 100 times fast!)

I think I'll actually call NASA right now to tell them that I'm ready for the job. Using bird calls.

I'm off to practice my bluethroat thrush.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

lance stardust: comet hunter

In 1999 NASA launched the space probe "Stardust." A "comet hunter" that followed a comet and sent us samples of the comet trail.

I want to be a comet hunter! I would change my name to Magnum Chase and ride a space sea horse! I could have a laser lasso that would catch comets that go rogue!

Like if a comet tied a damsel to some intergalactic train tracks! I could swoop in to save the day. With a laser lasso!

That would be awesome.

I would also only eat toast. Because I know how to make toast. Even in the frozen depths of space. Where it would stay fresh. Since it would be frozen.

I used to want to be an architect. I think I'll go for "comet hunter" instead.

Thank you Stardust. You're an inspiration.

I'm off to make toast.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ

just bad manners

Do you like the sun? You better be careful. It might eat you. And nobody will help.

The sun ate a comet. That's what the headline says! "Comet Eaten By the Sun As Spacecraft Watches."

The event was recorded by the Solar and Heliospheric Observatory. It just sat there and watched. It didn't even try calling the science police. It recorded the comet's death and posted it on youtube.

Kinda scary to know that space is so cold and heartless.

We can't contact the comet's family because nobody even got its name. It was the first time scientists had ever seen it.

I bet if it were Haley's comet they would have tried to help.

Spacecrafts can be real jerks sometimes.

Don't let the sun eat you. That's your lesson for today.

I'm off to look for my lost comet.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ