boring doesn't even begin to describe it

Scientists have used giant computers and complex algorithms to figure out the most boring day of the 20th century!  April 11, 1954 had nothing going on!  There wasn't any major news.  Nobody famous was born.  Nobody famous died.  Nothing interesting happened! 

Of course, you may disagree.  Perhaps you were born on April 11, 1954.  Sorry, but you are boring.  The scientists at Cambridge told me so. 

But now we have hit a Catch-22.  We just made the most boring day more interesting by calling it the "most boring day!"  How do we get around that? 

I have no idea.  And honestly, I don't care.  It's a boring day.  Can't we get these scientists and giant computers to give me free wi-fi instead of trying to figure out what's boring?  I can tell them what's boring: My day when I can't get online! 

How about fixing that?!  Do you know what's on the internet, Cambridge?!  Digital comics!  Recipes for pie!  Shakespearean-to-Modern English (not the band) translations of Shakespeare's plays! 

Okay, so that last one isn't really exciting, but it does help me understand Macbeth.  Which is really funny, by the way.  I just read it.  You should read it, too.  That whole part with Macduff trying to get Malcolm to come back to Scotland?  Comedy gold!

Heh..heh...I'm laughing just thinking about it.

Good times.  What was I talking about again? 

Who knows.  If it's my blog, I'm sure it wasn't important.

I'm off to laugh at Shakespeare.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ

study the facts

Another study about cell phones causing cancer has found that...they don't know yet. Inconclusive!

Also, there is a study that found that pesticides in food COULD be the cause of ADHD. Of course, the study couldn't PROVE it.

Sometimes I feel like people are just making things up. I can't prove things all the time! I can't not disprove things all the time, too!

I think the rotation of the earth gives people headaches. It's true! Ask anybody. Have they ever gotten a headache? Is the earth rotating??? YES! Can you disprove my theory?

No. You cannot. I dare you to try.

And that is why I am a scientist. And an astronaut. And a dinosaur hunter. Like...Dr. Captain Jurassic Blastoff, M.D. That is my new name.

I'm off to hunt for dinosaurs.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ