What?! Baby carrots are not actually little carrots?!
Yeah! They are just regular carrots cut into little "baby" sizes!
I honestly thought that they could grow little carrots. Everything else can be genetically altered, so why not carrots?
Did you know that? Why am I even buying these things? Why not just get big carrots? Or slice a big carrot into pieces and sell them as "Carrot Chips?"
What happens to the rest of the carrot? Do they just throw it out? Can they bag that up and sell them as "Carrot Scraps?" What kid wouldn't want to eat that?
I would totally eat carrot scraps!
Seems like a waste of carrot. Did you know there are bunnies starving in Utah? And we're just wasting scraps upon scraps of carrots.
It breaks your heart, doesn't it. Wish you could help out? Well you can! For the price of a Soy Iced Venti Caramel Macchiato, you can buy me a coffee. And if you give me MORE than that, I'll send it to the bunnies in Utah.
I'm off to starbucks.
Enjoy Everything.
-DJ
Showing posts with label carrots. Show all posts
Showing posts with label carrots. Show all posts
Friday, August 27, 2010
Monday, December 15, 2008
tie a tie
I was talking to somebody about objects that are also the verbs used to create them. It's strange that you can "tie a tie" but you don't "belt a belt" or "drive a drive." Why is that? Did ties get their names because that is what you had to do to put it on? Were people just lazy?
I mean, there are many words that could be used to describe this item. It could have been a sloopy. I have to tie my sloopy today. It could have been a fwip. I have to tie my fwip and then put on my jacket. I would have liked calling in a fwip. It sounds more fun that tie. Fwip also sounds like something Spider-Man would do. FWIP!
I guess you also toast bread to create toast. That's almost the same as tie. When you heat up chicken, it's still chicken. If you were going to heat up some vegetables, you don't change their name. Carrots don't become steamies.
Where was I going with this? I don't know. I might go dial my dial or play my play or read a read or write a write to figure it out. I probably won't do any of those things, though...because what I just wrote doesn't even make sense to me. If you can understand what is going on here, well...I don't know what that says about you. I am so completely lost right now.
I'm off to tie my fwip.
Enjoy!
-DJ
I mean, there are many words that could be used to describe this item. It could have been a sloopy. I have to tie my sloopy today. It could have been a fwip. I have to tie my fwip and then put on my jacket. I would have liked calling in a fwip. It sounds more fun that tie. Fwip also sounds like something Spider-Man would do. FWIP!
I guess you also toast bread to create toast. That's almost the same as tie. When you heat up chicken, it's still chicken. If you were going to heat up some vegetables, you don't change their name. Carrots don't become steamies.
Where was I going with this? I don't know. I might go dial my dial or play my play or read a read or write a write to figure it out. I probably won't do any of those things, though...because what I just wrote doesn't even make sense to me. If you can understand what is going on here, well...I don't know what that says about you. I am so completely lost right now.
I'm off to tie my fwip.
Enjoy!
-DJ
Thursday, October 16, 2008
the debator
I'm pretty sure that's not a word, but it looks cooler than debater, or one who debates. It sounds like Terminator. "I am the De-bay-tour!" It's more superheroish that way. I guess the superhero would be able to debate really, REALLY well.
Faster thinking than a speeding bullet!
More powerful vocal chords than a locomotive!
Able to convince tall buildings that they can be leapt over in a single bound!
When you can't win an argument, there is only one hero to call. THE DEBATOR!
Ok, so that's a lame power to have. Whatever. I bring this up because the presidential debates are over and it's time to choose. I have noticed something, though. The candidates are kind of like little kids. If you have little kids or if you ever were a little kid, then you probably know what I'm talking about. They don't necessarily lie, but they exaggerate...A LOT. They take something and make sound HUGE.
Mom: Eat your vegetables.
Kid: But mooooooooom! You make me eat vegetables ALL THE TIME!
Mom: You didn't eat any yesterday.
Kid: Well, practically all the time. Enough so it SEEMS like all I ever eat are vegetables.
Heck, I still feel like that sometimes, but that's because I like to whine. What we need is a debate with a moderator who can say, "That's not entirely true. Why not just tell us about your plan instead of making up stuff about your opponent?" Then, if they ever stray from the question, they get a slap to the face.
That's what I'd like to see.
I'd also like to see them chug pudding, but I don't think that'll happen either. I would totally vote for the guy who could chug more pudding. That's pretty much how I think all foreign policy should go. Think of all the problems that would be solved. I see peace in the middle east. It would be nice if Kentucky and Tennessee stopped all that fighting (I had to look at map for that joke...but I think you'll agree that it was totally worth it).
I'm off to eat my vegetables...AGAIN...it's, like, every day with these stupid carrots...
Enjoy!
-DJ
Faster thinking than a speeding bullet!
More powerful vocal chords than a locomotive!
Able to convince tall buildings that they can be leapt over in a single bound!
When you can't win an argument, there is only one hero to call. THE DEBATOR!
Ok, so that's a lame power to have. Whatever. I bring this up because the presidential debates are over and it's time to choose. I have noticed something, though. The candidates are kind of like little kids. If you have little kids or if you ever were a little kid, then you probably know what I'm talking about. They don't necessarily lie, but they exaggerate...A LOT. They take something and make sound HUGE.
Mom: Eat your vegetables.
Kid: But mooooooooom! You make me eat vegetables ALL THE TIME!
Mom: You didn't eat any yesterday.
Kid: Well, practically all the time. Enough so it SEEMS like all I ever eat are vegetables.
Heck, I still feel like that sometimes, but that's because I like to whine. What we need is a debate with a moderator who can say, "That's not entirely true. Why not just tell us about your plan instead of making up stuff about your opponent?" Then, if they ever stray from the question, they get a slap to the face.
That's what I'd like to see.
I'd also like to see them chug pudding, but I don't think that'll happen either. I would totally vote for the guy who could chug more pudding. That's pretty much how I think all foreign policy should go. Think of all the problems that would be solved. I see peace in the middle east. It would be nice if Kentucky and Tennessee stopped all that fighting (I had to look at map for that joke...but I think you'll agree that it was totally worth it).
I'm off to eat my vegetables...AGAIN...it's, like, every day with these stupid carrots...
Enjoy!
-DJ
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