Hybrid sharks have been found in Australia! The "official" story is that some sharks who like cold water have mated with sharks who like warm water. Because of climate change, the water is getting warmer everywhere, so they are creating mutant sharks that can live in medium-temperature water!
Once sharks learn how to swim in medium temperatures, you KNOW what comes next! Sharks who walk on land and wear razor-tipped bowler hats and have fins that shoot fire!
Hopefully the next stage of human evolution makes us razor-proof. And maybe we can shoot fire-extinguisher stuffs from our fingers.
Let's hope other animals don't learn how to live in comfortable temperatures. I mean, what will happen if polar bears learn how to live in 70-degree weather?
That's right! Telekinesis!
They might already be here. You never know. The person next to you RIGHT NOW could be a polar bear. I hear they shave themselves to blend in.
Make some seal noises. If they start to look hungry...RUN!
I would suggest making seal noises around everybody you see today. Just to be safe.
And please tell me where you will be doing this. I would like to watch. For scientific and safety reasons.
Not to laugh. I swear.
I'm off to watch you act sealy.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
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