If you jump off a wall, umbrellas don't make you fall slower. It happens in cartoons, but not in real life. Trust me. I've tried it.
I saw that in a cartoon this weekend. It was on Kipper. If you watch PBS Kids Sprout, then you know what I'm talking about. I mostly watch preschool television. I like the bright colors.
Now, I know Kipper can get pretty strange because he was flying around with his umbrella and it even got caught on the moon. I'm about 93.6% positive that THAT could never happen. Even if he did manage to escape the Earth's atmosphere by going 11km/s, I would think that after he fell off the moon, he would burn up during re-entry. That did not happen.
That would be scary if it did. This is a cartoon for babies. Babies don't like burning dogs. At least I HOPE they don't. Unless the rocket-babies are fighting an evil dog from the planet Button. Button is a scary planet with evil dogs who want to take over Earth. We don't have to worry about that because of the rocket-babies.
Did you ever try stuff from cartoons? I bet it didn't work.
Kipper also used the umbrella as a boat. I don't think that would work either, but I'm willing to try it. I trust Kipper. Maybe it's the english accent. Maybe it's because he's the dog with the slipper. I don't know.
I'm off to see if Rihanna will let me borrow her umbrella, ella, ella.
Enjoy!
-DJ
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