vacation 2010

I'm back from vacation! I'm excited. I don't know if you are.

As you may recall, my family likes to get together for a big vacation every year and this year it was the National Parks Extravaganza!

I saw the Valley of Fire, Death Valley and the Grand Canyon! Pretty cool, right? There were a lot of big rocks to climb. That was fun. I saw rabbit droppings. I also saw a petrified log. The two aren't related, even though it sounds like they are.

It was a great vacation. Even though it was on the other side of the States. So, I got back on Saturday night and had to turn the clock ahead so everything was FOUR HOURS LATER! I'm so messed up right now! It was like going to bed at 4pm and waking up at midnight. So, my head is a little wacky-doodle.

The highlights of my vacation were all the new songs I wrote. Most of them are one line. Like this little number!

"Going down...clap, clap...clap, clap...clap, clap"

and

"Acetylsalicylic acid...clap, clap, clap, clap...that's what we call aspirin"

or who could forget

"Valley of Fiyah!"

Those are actually the whole songs. There isn't much to them lyrically, but I sing them with passion. And I sing it over and over again so it SEEMS like they are way longer.

That's what I do on vacation. Don't you do the same?

I'm off to set my internal clock.

Enjoy Everything.

-DJ

vacation: 2008

Have you ever gone on vacation? I'm sure you have. Most people do this "vacation" thing. I'd rather do nothing all year and have two weeks of "working" instead. That would be WAY cooler. Unfortunately, my boss didn't go for that idea. My bookie also wouldn't be happy because I owe her lots of money and when that happens, her goons come after me and beat me up.

My bookie is a soccer mom named Nancy in Belchertown. She has two kids, Hunter and Julie, who can punch like the dickens. Little brats...

Anyway, it's almost vacation time. I got the swimsuit, but now I have to pack everything, which I hate. Am I the only person who despises packing? I have to pack all sorts of clothes AND THEN I pack shampoo and hair stuff and moisturizer and all sorts of stuff to make me pretty.

Wanna hear me complain more? I thought you would! So, I like to read comic books. Those are hard to bring on a trip, so I'll bring "collections." This is when they take a bunch of issues and put it in one book. So, it's a few hundred pages of comic book. Make sense? Well, these are hard to carry around and take on a plane. Books are small and easy to carry, not my stupid comics. Why couldn't I just like Stephen King or Dean Koontz. What kind of name is Koontz, anyway? Where does that come from? I wish my name was Koontz.

So that's it. When I get back I'll tell you all about it. It'll be like that essay you write in school. "What I Did On My Summer Vacation by DJ"

I'm sure you'll be on the edge of your seat until I get back.

Oh, and Nancy, I'm not telling you where I'm going, so you won't find me for a whole week! HA! Tell you kids to do some chores or something!

I'm off to...oh crud...they found me....Hunter...put down that bat...c'mon buddy...

Enjoy! (eek!)

-DJ